Manimal Magnetism

Y'know, it has recently occurred to me that I have this stange sort of magnetism.  A certain type of people are just drawn to me.  They must smell it on me and instantly know to come to me.  That's right.  I have a magnetism for Douchebags.  At every concert I go to, I will stand in a certain area and the most obnoxious fella will decide to stand next to me....sharing his beer with my shirt and shoes.  I don't know what it is about me, but douchebags just lurv me.  Someday this will get me something good. Someday.