Watching the news (!) over breakfast (!!), there was a story about a local robbery. In the local station's desire to make everything seem important, they had a split screen with the newscaster on one side and bullet points on the other. The "important" bullet points were as follows:
-Robbery at Jimmi Johns, 2803 University Ave
-Employees Tied up at gunpoint
-Safe not opened
-Chips Stolen
I can only imagine the sorry state of affairs when those robbers are at home, wiping the barbecue residue onto their "Thievin' pants".
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