Petit Morte (NSFW)

Alright, I'll admit, there are times when my libido seems to run away with me; more than usual, that is. Maybe this was made worse than by the Roller Derby or maybe those Overstock.com commercials or the new J.Crew catalog....or maybe I'm just a dirty boy. Yeah, that's prolly it. And the internet is a horrible enabler: (none of these are safe for work, be forewarned) The past few weeks, the various aggregate sites have been filled with bawdiness, here's a sampling:
-Kiss of death:Very sad: girl with peanut allergy dies after kiss
-Xeni's article about the sex machine's next door....unsung work by inventors that likely won't win the nobel.
-Em and Lo comment on the new monogamy
-Dear Lord. So, if it isn't bad enough that we get international male catalogs, lets hope we don't get on this email list: ridiculous advances in banana hammock technology. And similarly, the LED g-string; why say it, when you can broadcast it on your underwear?
-Response to Maureen Dowd's book "Are Men Necessary"...the only ten words that women need to effectively communicate with men
-This woman will definitely be going to another supermarket from now on; possibly the most embarrassing thing EVAR to happen to someone
-like coffee a little too much? Well, if coffee turns you on....
-Um...unfortunate headline from a novia scotia paper, involving jobs and RIM and whatnot
-Fat Ass: the holiday season always has an increase in copier repairs, often because people break through the copy machine glass with their asses. Geniuses.
-Way to go India: indian actress pelted with objects and arrested for her views on female sexuality. We've come a long way, baby.
-Bad Sex: The guardians yearly bad sex award for crappy sex scenes in literature
-Good Sex: Hot on the heels of the bad sex awards, the times tries to bring dignity back to literature...or at least actually exciting smut.
-Love potion No. 9: new nasal spray causes almost instant arousal; but mostly tested on rats and men....did they really need a spray for that?
-got perv on your gift list? well get one from the best of the sexy gift guide from the Voice
-I can't believe this guy totally stole my byline. From Nerve.
-funny: amish erotic stories.
-Well, if you felt any arousal, this will knock it right out of you: CRAZY rugby fan.
-Sex sells: sexifying (is that a word?) chess
-greedy bastard: virile lion....should be very very sleepy and prolly has herpes FOR SURE.
-Science ruins it again: apparently love fades over time. Explains alot. I'm gonna go cry.
-Patagonia with their new underwear recycling program. Awesome, they raise the bar again. Now i know where to send this
-50 cent is an idiot: corporate sellout wants to make a vibrator of his manhood... the best week ever has a great quote "A real gangster would just sleep with all his female fans. He wouldn't need no stinkin' vibrator."
-Nipples: apparently Coco the ape has a nipple fetish; it's okay coco, but i'm more of a leg man.
-Amazon.com: a search for "badonkadonk" gives you a varied and interesting bunch of results